Time for Change

As time has been going on, Ive praying for a change to come about in my life. Well it is happening shortly but slowly. I've watched as I begin to humble myself more unto the LORD what he is doing for me.... Im a work in progress. WOW, I was in bed last night and got my extra of sleep but yet in still managed to be late for church today. I dont know whats the trouble in getting there on time when I live less than 5 blocks from my church. I dont like the choir, the praise team, or here lately Pastor hasnt been his best. But I know I go late just because I dont want to hear them sing and I think its alot of people in my church who think the way I do cause every Sunday we arrive at the same time. Today was not so bad, I only missed the Praise team and the choir was not so bad. During the Word, I was drifting into my own impure thoughts and not paying attention to the Pastor. That lets me know Its time for me to move on cause he should steadily hold my attention. Ive been visiting other churchs and I need to pick one. I went to my grannies house to see her. I ASK EVERYONE TO PRAY FOR MY MOM AND GRANDMOTHER FOR I know not whats going on...but something is wrong with both and they are not telling me something. I try to make them go to the Hospital but they wont. Actually its beginning to bother me, but the GOD I serve is giving me Peace over the situation. I talked to Twin Via text messaging, he is on his way home from his trip, I pray his traveling mercies back here and that he has a peace of mind while driving in the car with his slow driving parents. We were engaged in an indepth conversation about who should be in control when your in a relationship. I think I am an aggressive dominant top and sometimes I can be controlling but I guess when im dealing with a subservient person that happens. Then I talked to another person I know and we talked and he let me know he was lonely and that he only sleeps with people for companionship and it doesnt fix his loneliness problem. I tell him
Maurice: Awww, to be honest...when you feel like that....that means its time for you and the man upstairs to talk
Maurice: But like you said it does not solve the problem at hand...Cause when the nut is busted and washed away here comes the problems all over again
Maurice: I have been lonely for a while now and at times its troubling....and it leaves me in Dismay.....All I want is to find someone who will make me happy
Maurice: YEs, I know totally how you feel, many nights I have laid in my self pity...feeling sorry for myself. And I too have said it would be easy to pack up and move away....but the counselor intuition steps in and lets me know...the same problems are going to be there Maurice...so until you confront them str8 forward here...they will forever be around you
Maurice: And in order for me to find true happiness from someone else I need to find it in me first....
Maurice: But I know...Believe I know...I have been there and in a lot of cases I am still there. I have alot of growing to do....
I have grown alot, Well pray for me that I grow stronger and better. Also, I have to go to court tommorow, pray for favor over my case...Dolton tells me that I am seeking love....
Im going to bed....