My out of town guests

This is to summarize the wonderful weekend I just had. I was angry at the fact that I couldnt go to Nashville and the fact that Kimora and his crew didnt take me with them. Nonetheless this weekend was a sucess and it in fact made up for me not going to Nashville. Hell I probably had a better time here with all of my friends than with a few of us going and the rest left behind. Friday, I ventured down to Champaign Urbana to see my lil sister and take her car to her. .
Then I was picked up by TOOROYAL and we journeyed back to Chicago in this lil ass HONDA. Tho it is a nice car with 1,000,000 miles on it, it just dont look right with 3 big niggas in it that are all over 6ft and and over 240 lbs. Im sure we looked like circus clowns getting out of that car. Then 5 big ass people piled up in my car... at least my honda is a lil bigger to go to Houseshoe casino to have dinner.. At this point everyone was in SHOCK! We were in shock about that $32 per person we were told and they were in shock looking at 6 (ME, CASH,TOOROYAL,KING LOUIS, BARTENDER, and Dalilbbrown) big boys coming in there.
It would have been more but everyone else bailed out on me. Im sure they got on the phone and called in for back up cause they thought were going to give that buffet hell. We left and got Carbondale and then headed downtown to see a movie that was sold out! A lil angry I was after I learned that we were attempting to see a movie that just came out! Of course it was going to be sold out! Then after that we went back to my place to have drinks and just to chill.
The night was going good of course with everyone seeming to be a lil sexually aggressive. What the hell did he put in them drinks?! Then we all went to bed, cash went home, and Bartender went in the bathroom after I pushed his ass off my carpet after he said he was not feeling well.

We all went to bed only to wake up to Bartender laying in the floor with only pants on and a towel tied around his head. WTF? then to get up and see all this fucking red throw up in my bathroom. I was hoping that he did not throw up on my crisp white shower curtain. I went to get my axe to cut his ass up! I woke him up out of his drunken stuper to be lied to. He knew very damn well that he did it and got up denying it.. What remains a mystery is how he managed to get from the bathroom to the front room naked cause his pants were in the front room. Later we went to eat and then Michigan city and then to South Bend to meet the infamous South bend. A stunt! Then we ventured over to Niles Michigan to this good ass Haunted House that got all of our asses right together. I aint gone put all them big niggahs on blast by putting the 2 smallest in front of everyone(me and dalilbbrown), but we held our own. Then we went to eat.

On Sunday we went to church and then down town to eat and they all piled back in my house last night. Today I get to work to find out my ex is hired and started today. Ive been acting like I dont know him.

So Simple

After the events of the last 24 hrs.. the only thing that plays in my head is the Song "It all could be so simple but you'd rather make it Hard" by Lauren Hill. Why is that we as human beings dont believe "Fat meat is greasy," " A hard head makes an even softer Ass," "that things wont happen?" I have said this before we are the authors and finishers of our own destiny. Well I have a friend whom I have talked to over and over again just to try and make a valid point. Like the 0ld saying goes "it went in one ear and out the other" It really bothers me that my words of wisdom never permeated the skull and were not heeded too. Why is that we dont learn until we hit brick walls head first when in fact we could have just done right the first time. We are awarded so many chances to be forgiven and improve but when is enough, E-FUCKING-nough? I am a person that learns from others mistakes.... I learn from my own mistakes.... I listen to what older wiser people tell me and sometimes I get advice from my peers. Its time for us to get control over our lives, step up to the plate, and be adults. We cant go on much longer making excuses for our actions.. we cant on not recieving knowledge... We need to do something before we hit that brick wall... often not being able recover... Not often do the passengers in cars that hit brick walls survive. (Except Kimora & Jamal.. LOL..) So to save yourself the tears and heartache... do better before the END Comes..... Remember KNOWLEDGE IS THE POWER AND KEY TO EVERYTHING~
~Maurice a.k.a GOD's Chosen ONE~~

Whats your Attraction?

For the last couple of weeks I have been having crazy dreams. Dreams ranging from me having sex with my friends to me talking to people in my church that I dont necessarily care for. Only the LORD knows what these dreams are about and they're exact meaning. The first dream is about my childhood friend and Ive known him all his life of 24 yrs. Imagine this he is a TOP like me. But he came over to the house and we hugged(we never do that) and then we sat and cuddled on the couch to watch tv. He told me he likes to be cuddled when he sleeps(fact) so we went to the bedroom and went to bed with me spooning him. Damn, I thought he has a big ass and the nicest hips to match it(fact). I slowly began to grab, massage, and rub on them without any resistance from him. WOW, I thought. Some way some how we ended up getting down. This top nigga let me fuck him. It was hott. I was so seet and gentle. I woke up! in the second dream we were doing it again. He was telling me that he never knew that someone could enjoy something as pleasurable as this. The next day he told me if I get rid of DK1 that he was all mine. Oh, wow! I thought, how are 2 tops gone be together? He sugguested we both be verse! I dont know if I could but he was surely sprung on the dick. I woke up. Damn, i keep thinking what the hell are these dreams about? Could it be that he is exactly what I like.. Dark and thick with a FAT ASS. Of course their is the brothers/sisters with the good personalities and can hold any type of intellectual conversation. Oh to see a person with all those qualities makes my dick stand at Full MASS of ??+(wouldnt you like to know). Or could it be that I am horny and I am lacking sex in my life? What could it be? But to be real I like the thick boyz I am a big boy lover. Starting with a 36w and up to about a 48w if the person carries they're weight real. To all my 360 bloggers, what attracts you to the people? What is the first quality that you admire about a person? Non-physical characteristics?

Do you ever get enough?

This had to be one of the worst weekends I have had in a very long time. If it was not one thing then it was another. Friday night I had prearranged to meet up with one of my friends for a night over to my house. His plans changed so Co-worker ended up coming over and I had fun with her and then Westside came over. I almost had my crew there with me but Cash and Dalilbbrown didnt come. Saturday, I went to this store on the Westside with Co-worker and then we ended up in Schaumburg shopping at Woodfield and Ikea. I love that store. I am actually getting an early start on Christmas this year so I was buying stuff so I wont wait until December and have to blow a whole check on shopping. Cash,Tooroyal, Kimora, Dalilbbrown, Timmy are we exchanging gifts? Let me know! Saturday was not the best day for me. I had a slight chip on my shoulder to begin with and then for some reasons known and unknown I kept getting more and more mad. I tend to get/have a very nasty disposition at times. I really didnt want to be bothered by anyone. So I ended up going to over to Co-workers house and talking to her for a very long time. Then I went to my house and got fucked up just so I could express myself thoroughly without anger and being mean at the same time. I had a very long talk with my S.O. and now things seem to be better already. Sunday was a regular Sunday for me except for when I was on my way home from Church these Bulldagging police woman chased me down and pulled me over. I was not speeding nor did I violate laws. I raised the down windows for them to come to my car with they're guns drawn telling me to put my hands out the window. No problem HOES. It was a blk and Mexican one. I swear they dont like to see Blk people with nothing nice. I work hard as hell everyday not to be harrassed. The Chili Pepper(no offense to my hispanic readers) says what you got? GOT! I dont have anything and what are you looking for cause whatever it is I dont have it. Then she asked me what was I doing out there and where was I coming from. I said I am coming from church dont you see my clothes and my bible. Then she started asking me all these questions regarding me and my car. Then finally after 10 mins she asked me for my license. It was cold and I didnt have any gas. So rolled up the windows while one stood on the side of the car and the other went to check our records. CLEAN, so I was not even remotely concerned. The hoe tells me to keep my windows down. It was c0ld so I rolled the drivers window half way down. So I began to write down her name and badge number because Im reporting this as harrassment. She went and wrote me a PARKING TICKET? Can you believe it. Made up some kind of reason to write a ticket. Harrassing me when they are criminals to catch.

Blown Away!

Whaddup to Longshot, my new friend. Ive been talking to him for such a short while and already It seems like I have know him my whole life. He is a really cool guy.
Next Shout out too all my friends NIU_fynest, TOOROYAL, CASH, Kimora LEE, Dalilbbrown,Timmy,Riqqi and the rest of my 360 friends.
Have some things just ever blew you away before? Well the event of the last 7 days have been mind blowing experiences. First friday I night I invited Dekalb2 over to my house, not on anything. He got mad at me and told me not to worry about speaking to him ever again. Oh well I dont care.
Then there is Westside Queen. He is such a fucking cockblocking ass niggah that he called around to find out who was coming to my house and lucked up. So he thought he had the right person, so he called and snapped on the person about coming to my house where I pay rent. He was partially right, it was the wrong person but the person he snapped on did have some association with the person that was coming over. So being the messy person he is he says Maurice I know who was at y0ur house. "No one was there!" Well it was Dekalb1 who was supposed to come over there. "The name doesnt ring a bell" Then he was like his friend told him that it was him that came over. WTF ??? I thought you checkin up on me and shit like your my muthafucking nigga All I wanted to know was how in the hell did my name come up in anyone shit? Needless to say.. It was confirmed by Winthrop, who called me to ask me if he had come over. Then to find out that im being discussed. I was flattered as well as angered for the simple fact Mofo's need to mind their business. I couldnt believe it.
Then their is Restaurant is messy ass hell. He was online talking to me and asked me to view his webcam just so my ex could walk past the camera. WTF I thought?
Then my landlord blew the shit out of me... He asked me did I have a boyfriend or a girlfriend? Im thinking how is that any business of yours, and since it was not a question on the credit application I didnt see the importance of him knowing that.
Im so glad this week is almost over.

The Reading of a LIFETIME

Yesterday so many things happened. One I was talking to someone I used to talk too. It was actually a great conversation and I enjoyed it. He invited me over to his place but I was unable to attend due to prior engagements. So I arrived at the Dentist office early for my appointment. I got called in and went in the back. There was the BIG ASS needle I was oh lord. Well she normally uses some cream on my gums before she sticks me. Well she used it and it still didnt work.. DAMNIT.. She stuck that BIG ASS needle in my gums and it hurt like hell.. All the while she is telling me to relax.. I uttered a groan and another groan and uttered the words how the hell can I relax with a BIG ASS needle in my jaw and it hurts. So then she starts drilling and LORD did it hurt. I was stop now. So she stopped and waiting and went back to it. IT hurt! When she was finished she said you never acted like this before... See you came here with a "preconcieved thought." LOL.. well I dont want to be another Diamond Brownridge(RIP) and possibly thats why I was tense. I went to the Car dealer to get my headlight replaced(yes again) and then they started trying to sell me another car. Ok.. I hate being bored and I hate waiting.. So I started driving
the 07's and so I decided to lease one since I am not to like keeping cars long. While I was waiting I began to think about the "EX" and us rekindling. I thought about what it was like to try and date him 11 months ago. Then I Thought about the comment /Scripture he left on my blog and decided that it was best if we didnt rekindle any kind of relationship but more so work on a friendship. "If he didnt like you then he is not going to like you now" is what kept playing in my head. Back then he didnt like my hair(me), didnt like the way I thought(me), thought I was a hoe, might I add Im not(me). So it seemed that everything about me disgusted him so now why the change of heart. He is a person that I really like and grew to care for.. only to not be accepted and have my heart handed to me in a basket after it was stepped on and abused. After thinking all this.. I told them to keep the truck and if I want it, Ill come back tand get it tommorow(which is today). So today, is NATIONAL COMING OUT DAY! To bad I aint got no one to come out too and no one asked me either so.. Im still on the DL or whatever. LOL.. Well as I have mentioned before its this 51 yr old man that is employed here. He is a hot mess. Last summer (05) he tried to get with me but I was not interested. So I told him I was not going to date him because 1. he was 51 2. which he could be my daddy 3. he was uncircumsized and people who know me know that I am not fond of them unless I love the person. 4. Im not anyone's fuck buddy and if I have one its gone be someone I picked 5. He is a top and what the hell 2 tops gone do. So he kept on thinking he could whoo me.. Then he did what I never expected an old man to do.. He bad mouthed me to company's gay clique and made it seem like I was tryin to get him and mess with him while we were at work. Well it got back to me so I been ignoring him since I heard about it. So he had me trapped in the breakroom by my self. He said are you still mad at me? "MAD aint it.. I fucking hate you MUTHAFUCKER. How in the hell you gone do me like that? Here im young and you got muthafuckers thinking im easy. I dont appreciate the bullshit and I aint gone stand for it. And dont tell me you didnt talk about it... Cause no one cause tell me this shit if you didnt!" Ok Im sorry for talking about you and discussing you. I was wrong! "DAMN RIGHT! " Can we be at least cordial? "MUTHA FUCK YOU! How the hell can I be cordial with you and you have fucking slandered my got damned name and think the shit is cute. Keep on laughing muthafucker.. keep on and I got you next time I see you at Jackson Park.. You better fucking hope I dont catch you in the woods or coming out with your pants down and a pictute mysteriously appears all over the fucking agency you fucking old ass CUNT! I dont like shit and I dont want to be a part of any so keep my fucking name out your mouth. NOW WE CAN BE CORDIAL." Can you believe this?

Bullcrap

God is doing some serious working in my life. I was sitting back thinking yesterday how my life is going relatively well right now and I am not stressed, I am happy and stacking my paper. There still comes a point where life issues can throw blows at you. But I can thank GOD I can swing my Steel LouisVille Slugger and return them to sender. Over the weekend I had a lot of time to myself and I began to think. I began to think about where are we going as a race and as a "Community?" We lie and make up shit to make ourselves like the leading man or the victim when in fact were not. I aint gone lie a lot of us on are PURE Bullshit. And why is it that the people that treat us nice we treat them so bad and those that treat us horrible we love. Someone needs to do some research on the subject. So I called up some of my old "Friends" just to see what are they talking about and to prove my theory of bullshit. Friday night I asked one "friend" to accompany me too dinner. Well instead of just saying NO.. They had to go through the statistical analysis of why they couldnt attend but wanted to know where I had in mind. HOW HARD is it? Just say No Maurice I dont want to attend(Incidence of Bullshit). I was not mad at this person cause I expected it. I then called Walmart2. I said hello Walmart! Who is This? ITs Maurice. Oh hey. Went through the whole greeting and finding out how we are. Then the BULLSHIT began to flow so freely like a fountain throwing out water. "Maurice, I have a boyfriend now but im caught up because he says he loves me and we only been together 2 weeks and of course I miss you. I never said I didnt want to talk to you my phone was stolen and I was not able to get in contact with you. But I really miss you!" I felt my glasses slide to the end of my nose and the fierce read flow freely and let him have it. These YOUNG FAGS! Who the hell does he think he is playing with.. I was 19 before. But after I let him know that people who miss one another make contact with one another. And no matter what if you want to keep in contact with a person then you will when you have they're email address, facebook information(might I add, has all my contact info available to my friends), and my telephone #. All he could do was get off the phone. Then we go to Dekalb2 who is another stunt queen who thinks it all about "her." It was our plan to hang out at SPIN on Saturday and of course he came up with some excuse as to why he couldnt come. But in the next 15m I got a text telling me if I didnt go to the club he could come over. As bad as I didnt want to go to club I went. He claims he doesnt like GAY clubs but he is gay. Why is that all the people you have liked treats you so bad. Then something similiar happened to my friend TOOROYAL this weekend... I felt like Lynn Whitfield in "Thin Line Between Love and Hate."
Lets Go and them Royal cause they running us LOW. If no one else takes heed to nothing else I said, take heed to this.............. TREAT PEOPLE THE WAY YOU WANT TO BE TREATED AND IF YOU DONT WANT TO DO SOMETHING SIMPLY JUST SAY NO. DONT GO THROUGH ALL THE MELADRAMATICS AND PSYCHODRAMATICS OF LYING AND MAKING UP EXCUSES.

This weekend was not at all spectacular but it wasnt too bad. Friday I did the working 2 jobs thing and then went home. I was listening to one of my clients talk and he was going on and on about how he does like GAY people. So I let him go and then I interrupted him and asked him why doesnt he like gay people? His answer was because they are GAY. I then asked him is that a reason not to like someone? NO.. I had to explain to him that GAY people are no different than anyone. They are normal people Like "Me" and him. I then asked him how would he feel if people didnt like him because he was black? He wouldnt like it of course so then when came to a happy medium that if a gay person didnt do something directly to him then he needs not dislike them. WHEW!~ Saturday, I got up and went to the Laundry Mat and washed clothes. Then I came back and went to a Book signing with Cash and met up with some other bl0ggers there. The book is called Tops and Bottoms By Micheal Carpernter. This was truly a new experience for me because I had never been to one of these before and I actually enjoyed it. It had an open forum to ask the author questions about the book and his views on certain things. After that I went back to my house and got Dekalb and took him to his parents house. YES, we separated! Its ok and we are both fine with it. Later that night I went out with Cash and Atlanta. Spin was not hitting like we thought it should so we left there and went to the generator. Now I hate the generator with a passion so I was angry. Ive only been there one another time and all I did was sleep then So Guess WHAT?? I slept once again. Ill never go to that place ever again. Sunday, I went to church. What a great experience. I dont know if I mentioned it before but CASH goes to church with me now and this makes week 4 or 5. So he must enjoy it if he keeps coming back. Elder, preached a good word about Change is coming for most of us by the end of the year. I am claiming it because ITS MY TIME TO BE BLESSED! I woke up at 4 this morning and when I didnt drift back to sleep I knew it was GOD telling me something. I love them that love me; and those that seek me early shall find me Proverbs 8:17. This is the way GOD communicates with me. If he has something that he wants me to know.. He always tells me at about 3 or 4 in the morning meaning to seek him early. With my soul have I desired thee in the night; yea, with my spirit within me will I seek thee early: for when thy judgments are in the earth, the inhabitants of the world will learn righteousness Isiah 29:6.This morning I awoke at 6 and almost made the decision to turn over and go back to sleep. I knew then that it was time for me to change careers. I have not mentioned it but I have been sending out resumes and applying online for other positions. Every place in Chicago is closed today and I am sitting here at work with no chance of leaving early. ALL I can ask NOW is that the Saints of GOD.. PRAY for my Change.... a much needed change and my growth in the LORD.

All About Me

Its been a long time since I touched down in blog land. But alots been going on with me working, searching for a new employment, exercising,decorating my apt, kicking it with my friends(old and new), and going back and forth through depression. Now that I am back I will do my best to try and do one blog a week. Every weekend for the last month or so I have been kicking it with Cash, Atlanta, and Blknazn. We have been going to eat and then clubbing it up. People are starting to act brand new again like they have never seen a group of gay boys together. For instance a couple weeks ago it was about 5 of us big boys at Red Lobster.. People were looking at us and shit. So finally I was like WTF are you looking at? Then at Bin 36 on Saturday the server kept asking us what were we there for? Why did it matter? So finally I told him please stop digging. I have to say that Spin has now become my hang out spot and finding a spot dont even mean nothing to me anymore. But today my heart is heavy and I got some things to discuss with the blog world and I hope I get some positive feedback. Well me and my guy have been having a few troubles and its getting out of hand. Is it possible to love someone and not be in love? Yes I know it possible. Can 2 people who are totally different make it? Can sex ruin a relationship? My situation is that I want it and he doesnt feel like it all the time.. I want the blog world to tell me what can a person do to make a relationship work? See the problem is now I love him but we are loosing our connection for many different reasons. He says I want him to be the perfect man.. but I didnt know that those existed. I have a high sex drive and I LOVE to have sex and we dont do it enough for me. I love this man so much that Im willing to compromise myself slightly to make it work and still its not good enough for him. I am not trying to string him along! I have no problem being alone. Maybe my problem is that I require to much attention and he aint giving it to me. Maybe I am a perfectionist. Maybe Im bored! Maybe he is not doing it for me anymore. I dont know what it could be but i am not in the business for hurting people or for people being able to hurt me. But in all relationships everyone have to conform and compromise else relationships wont work. But I would like some feedback.